Answers - June 2013 - Page 2:
Drew - Via Twitter
"A cowboy hat means Im ashamed of my small penis." Thank u #Simpsons 4 saying what everyone who doesnt wear a cowboy hat is always thinking.
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Drew - Via Twitter
I used 2 have hopes & dreams,then I learned u can mix #Vodka w/anything & carry it around all day in plastic bottles #TheRestIsBlurryHistory
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Drew - Via Twitter
FOUND:1 broken water heater, abandoned on the sidewalk by my house. 2 claim COME GET THIS FUCKING WATER HEATER OFF MY SIDEWALK! #WhoDoesThat
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Drew - Via Twitter
After considering many options I have settled on this saying to be tattooed above my butthole. Also maybe on my chin. https://t.co/VemMTWECJ7
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Drew - Via Twitter
Cant wait til I can afford a VCR so I can watch this.I FUCKING LOVE NATIONAL PARKS! #WhatIAssumeEveryOldPersonThinks https://t.co/3iRq4hI3Gl
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Drew - Via Twitter
Dear @prodigalsam, u r a complete fucking tool and I hope you get herpes on ur stupid hipster mustache. Fucking ass hat thief piece of shit.
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Drew - Via Twitter
I wonder why this elevator in the old person retirement home smells like old people. #TheWorldMayNeverKnow
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Drew - Via Twitter
Someday someone is going to give me an award for something. It might be "Best Broadway Style Play In Prison" but Im getting a damn #award.
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Drew - Via Twitter
How fat do you have to be to get that #LapBandSurgery? I just need a goal to shoot for. #SeeYouAtTheBuffet
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Drew - Via Twitter
My favorite tweets r when any1 complains about their relationships & how upset they are at someone else. Im just kidding, shut the fuck up.
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Drew - Via Twitter
I cant wait until Im so old I fall asleep every night in a recliner in the living room. Just kidding, I plan to die a lot sooner than that.
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Drew - Via Twitter
They say "If u love ur job u never work a day in ur life" but what about all those days in ur life u literally work at that job? #StillSucks
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Drew - Via Twitter
Whose ur favorite #SpiceGirl? If u answered anything other than "The only 1 without #AIDS" then I should probably admit I gave them all AIDS
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Drew - Via Twitter
At least the shingles virus bought me dinner first. #GetInsideMe https://t.co/c8auzV84AS
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Drew - Via Twitter
I just got this tattooed above my asshole. #EveryoneIsWelcome https://t.co/ZfTfOnCagx
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Drew - Via Twitter
R u thinking about moving 2 western #Nebraska & r also a #Horse? They will starve ur hay eating ass so dont even try. https://t.co/28Hds5mcqP
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Drew - Via Twitter
Heres a pic of my precious girl...but then my stupid 2 yr old daughter photobombed the special moment w/all my #Vodka https://t.co/9xf8aXQZwo
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Drew - Via Twitter
FALSE. In a real #FunHouse no 1 gets out alive. Also its the best place to by crack & host a baby shower. #CrackBaby https://t.co/xazGqoZ33y
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Drew - Via Twitter
Best #GarageSale find ever. Not the #Jesus sign, Im talking about the black sheep tapestry and dirty Vtech phone base https://t.co/C2nFKxMuDO
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Drew - Via Twitter
@KaraWhalen26 Actually I did die, which means u just received ur very first #GhostTweet Oooooohhhhhh, spooooooky and shiiiiiiiiiit.
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