Despite my polite objections, my jackass neighbor keeps letting her dog poop in my yard. I'd do something drastic, but her daughter is really hot, and every time I see her when she comes to visit her mom, I just can't bring myself to start a feud with the old battle axe, fearing I'll blow my chances. How can I find a reasonable solution, or perhaps even better, how can I exact my revenge and get this to stop without her knowing it was me?

Angry Neighbor in Anapolis, The solution to this problem is going to make you very happy...and aroused. The key here is not to exact your revenge in secret, but to hit her where it hurts...where it REALLY hurts. From now on you should take every spare minute you have to formulate a plan to get her smoking hot daughter to date you. What worse punishment could their be for her than knowing you are banging her perfect 10 daughter? And what better reward could their be for you than getting to tap that ass out of spite? In time the poop will stop and you will have your neighbor exactly where you want her...and her daughter exactly where you want her (on top of you.) Now that's sexy justice.