My house is currently on fire I dont know what to do so I thought I would tweet to you about it. I think the whole upstairs is burned down and now the main floor is about to go.

Inferno in Idaho, The most important thing to remember in your emergency situation is this....delete your twitter account. Before you do anything in your blazing inferno you need to start up your computer, go to whatever the hell website twitter is at, then delete your account and never even think of using it again. It is a proven fact that 134% of all house fires are caused by people who have twitter accounts. In fact, just having a twitter account increases your chances of having cancer by 287%. So if you really want to do something to help yourself, let the house burn to the ground and, for the love of god, get rid of that damn twitter account.