I was wondering why chicks don't like "The Discovery Channel Song" by the Bloodhound Gang anymore?! I mean it was a classic. It was even better than "I'm Blue" by Eiffel 65. Where else can a young buck learn how to pull out the "knee" and grind on the dance floor at three am with a slightly overweight chick wearing a haltertop. Come on these are the important things in a young man's life. I have to pretend that I like dancing to Beyonce if I have any chance to score in this town. What's our world coming too? Should I end it now?

Perplexed in PA and Never Getting Back to Florida, Yes, you should absolutely end it all. First, you live in Pennsylvania, that is reason enough to literally take a flying leap. Secondly, I don't think you or I or anyone should have to live in a world where Eiffel 65 doesn't automatically make an overweight girl take her clothes off. "I'm Blue" takes on a whole new meaning when it is in reference to your genitals.